There is no question that sisterhood is important, but many women lament there is not a strong sisterhood around them. These sisters should not fret, but instead should look for the opportunities to build the ties they want to exist. Like friendships, sisterhood does not just appear– It is made! Our busy lives and family demands often take precedent over the forming of new relationships.
BE SISTERS
TAKE TIME FOR EACH OTHER
BY SR. ALIYA DANZEISEN
Amongst the Muslim community, it is commonplace to hear people referring to each other as brothers and sisters. For example, “Brother Ali will bring the food” or “Invite Sister Salwa to come.” Most often there is no biological connection to the individuals whatsoever. This concept of brotherhood and sisterhood in Islam derives directly from Allah’s guidance: The believers are but brothers, so make reconciliation between your brothers and fear Allah that you may receive mercy. (Qur’an 49:10).
This concept of connection through brotherhood encompasses sisterhood as well: The believing men and believing women are allies of one another. They enjoin what is right and forbid what is wrong and establish prayer and give charity and obey Allah and His Messenger.
Allah will have mercy upon them, for Allah is Almighty and Wise. (Qur’an 9:71)
It is clear that through these connections and family-like treatment, we will create a supportive and quality community that can work as a defence in times of trial and work as a strength in times of abundance. Hold firmly to the rope of Allah all together and do not become divided. Remember the favor of Allah upon you, when you were enemies and he brought your hearts together and you became brothers by his favor. (Qur’an 3: 103)
Yet, friendship and sisterhood need tending to grow—you must make the effort and offer enough time to make the connections flourish. According to research from the University of Kansas, it takes approximately 40 hours to form a friendship. To develop deeper friendship ties, it will take a bit longer, but this
research shows there is a strong correlation about the time spent with each other and the closeness of the relationship.
So to form those connections, you need to find time with others. If you want a sisterhood, you must make it a priority and find the time to spend time with other women!
Your efforts to build bonds with other Muslimah can be big or small. You can participate in (or even help organise) community events or you can invite one sister out for coffee. You can go out for walks together. Attend community
lectures. Accept invitations offered to you. Each is a step to building connections and towards sisterhood.
So this month, reflect on your efforts to reach out to others and consider finding time in your schedule to begin building the sisterhood around you. Make an effort to find time for others. Abdullah ibn Amr reported Prophet Muhammad
(PBUH) said: Whoever would love to be delivered from the Hellfire and entered into Paradise, then let him die with faith in Allah and the Last Day, and let him treat people the way he would love to be treated. (Muslim 1844)
Ultimately, be the sister you would like to have for yourself!
